Hawk Tuah Girl Haliey Welch Avoids Charges as SEC Closes $HAWK Memecoin Probe​: Here is Why

• The Hawk Tuah Girl vanished for four months after her $HAWK memecoin crashed and investors lost millions.
• She’s finally posted again with zero explanation, apology, or accountability.
• The coin once hit a $490M market cap—yes, a coin named after a viral blowjob joke.

Okay, I don’t even know why I’m still writing about this. My brain’s screaming “move on,” but my timeline keeps feeding me Hawk Tuah Girl updates like it’s still 2023 and nothing makes sense. And apparently—because we all live in a cartoon now—people still care. Like, a lot of people. So here we are.

You remember her, right? Hawk Tuah girl. Viral for saying… well, you know what she said. That clip. Anyway, she launched a memecoin called $HAWK, it pumped to the moon, everyone got excited, and then — rug pulled. Millions gone. Poof. People begging for jail time. It was all over in less time than it takes to warm up a frozen pizza.

She Slept Through the Fallout. Literally.

After the whole thing exploded (in a bad way), she dipped. Like, vanished. Four months of radio silence. She allegedly just… went to sleep. As in, took the longest nap in Internet history. No posts. No statements. No “sorry y’all got rugged, my bad.” Just gone.

And now? She’s kinda back. She made a post. Didn’t say much. No apology. No explanation. Just the digital equivalent of a “hey.”

Honestly, you couldn’t make this stuff up.

Should Anyone Be Surprised? No. Should Anyone Have Bought This Coin? Also No.

Let’s be real for a second—if you threw money at a coin named after a viral clip about blowjob techniques, and you’re surprised it went to zero, I don’t even know what to tell you. At some point, we’ve gotta stop pretending this isn’t the exact outcome memecoins are built for.

We’ve seen it before. We’ll see it again. Coffeezilla will make a 12-part docuseries. Reddit will scream “justice.” And still… someone else will launch a coin tomorrow, and it’ll probably pump, too.

Memecoins are modern-day snake oil with a Discord server and a logo made in Canva. But we all eat it up because it’s chaos, and chaos gets clicks. You know it. I know it.

Final Thought Before I Log Off Forever (Until the Next One)

If this is the last memecoin blog I ever have to write on a sports website, that’d be great. But knowing the world we live in? Dave might drop a Barstool coin next week and I’ll be back here pretending I never said any of this. Maybe I’ll even buy in. Responsibly, of course.

P.S. One day you’ll have to explain to your kids how a meme coin named after a blowjob sound hit $490 million in market cap before it all disappeared. And no one went to jail. We really are living in a simulation.